Can I run my fingers through your hair?

Some days I really wish I was married. Like today, for instance. Not really because I want a husband (I'm pretty content right now...), but because I wouldn't run into situations like this so much...

I stopped to pick up the mail at the Benbow's house, and when I got out of the car, I saw my friend R sitting on the stoop across the street. I had just seen him last night, and we said a quick hey, how are ya, etc., then went on our ways. Here's what happened tonight...

R (on the other side of the street, yelling): Hey! Do you know who I am?

Me: Uh, what?

R: Do you know who I am?

Me: Well, unless I lost my memory between yesterday and today, yeah.

R: (takes off his glasses) You remember me?

Me: R, what are you talking about?? Of course I know who you are. Are you smokin' somethin'?

(R comes over to give me a hug. I try to give him a "side hug," but that's kind of hard when someone's coming at you like a bear coming in for a kill...)

Me: Whoo! You're not smokin' anything but you sure have been drinking!! I can smell it on ya!

(R laughs a little bit)

R: Can I run my fingers through your hair?

Me: WHAT?!

R: What? Can I run my fingers through your hair?

Me: Uh, NO.

R: Well, can I just touch it?

Me: No. I think you need to go sit back down across the street.

R: What? Why?

Me: R, you need to go to bed. Come talk to me when you're not drunk.

R: Okay, well, can I have another hug?

Me: No. You've met your hug quota for the day.

R: My quota?? Alright, well, I love you.

Me: Uh huh.

(I started to walk towards the house at this point)

R: Uh huh?? What do you mean uh huh?

Me: I don't know, uh huh. Is that bad?

R: Yeah it's bad. You're supposed to say I love you too R.

Me: Alright, I love you too, R. Now go to bed.

R: Alright. I'll see you later.